Meredith Turns 3!

I'm so behind on this blog! This week I'll be adding lots of new posts so keep checking back. Meredith turned 3 on May 15! I can't believe she is 3 already. It seems like yesterday I was holding my tiny preemie at only 5 lbs in my arms. She has turned into such a funny little girl. She is very spunky and absolutely loves to make us all laugh. She is very picky with food except for sweets which she could eat all day. Her favorite thing to do is to play dress-up and play "house" with Clara. She has such an imagination! We got home from our cruise just in time to celebrate her big day. I made her pancakes for her birthday breakfast and we went out to Red Robin for dinner. We had a simple party at our neighborhood park with her closest little friends. She loved getting all of the attention since just a month before Clara had her birthday. We love our sweet Meredith!

Our Amazing Cruise!

I really want to write about the whole cruise but it will take me forever so I'll do it little by little. Go ahead and skip the details if you want because I really want to write this for us to remember everything.
The reason for our trip was to celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary. I can't believe it's been that long! We started saving about 6 years ago knowing that we wanted to do something special at 10years. When we booked it in Oct '09 I knew that I wanted/needed to lose weight before the trip. I didn't want my self conscienceness to affect my fun so I really needed to do it for myself. I even bought a swim suit in a way smaller size for motivation! I worked really hard for those 7 months and lost 20 lbs. I had a goal weight and wasn't sure that I'd lose those last 5 but I made it just 2 days before we left. Yay! I have NEVER set a weight loss goal and actually make it so I was super proud of myself. I still have 20 more to go to get to my ultimate goal but I'm not stressing about it.
We are so blessed to have Ben's amazing mom to be there for us when we need her. She was more than willing to come and take care of the kids while we went on our trip. The kids were excited but my sweet mama's boy was getting a little apprehensive the closer it got. When they took us to the airport I promised myself I wouldn't cry first. As soon as we pulled up to the drop off Ethan started bawling and it killed me. That boy can cry some major tears! Then Meredith started crying which was unexpected and made me cry even more. Clara tried to squeeze out some tears with no luck, that is just her personality though. I felt so much guilt and missed them terribly the whole time we were gone. It started to get easier after a couple of days but then the last day it all came back. I couldn't wait to get home to them!
I can't remember the last time I flew without kids. Ben and I just relaxed and watched a movie on the Ipad and it was great. I felt very liberated the entire trip not having to be responsible for any little ones. We were both like "we can do whatever we want!" and it was exciting. I forgot what it was like to just hang out with Ben and to just hang out with myself. Since I had never cruised before I had no idea what to expect. It didn't even hit me until the cruise ships were in view. We got on the Freedom of the Seas (Royal Caribbean) at about 1:30 and just explored the ship for a while. It was a beautiful day but very very windy (and I had a skirt on!). We set sail at 4:30 and it was so exciting! After the set sail party we went and checked AGAIN to see if our luggage was there and it wasn't. I was very annoyed and almost in tears because we wanted to go to the Welcome Show at 7:00 and we both needed to change into appropriate attire. I think it was about 6:00 that it finally arrived and by that time the nausea had set in. I did not come prepared with a patch or Dramamine because I didn't think I'd need it. We'd only been sailing 1 1/2 hours and I didn't even feel any movement, yet I had major motion sickness. I was on the floor of the bathroom not sure I'd even make it anywhere that night but Ben went and got me a sandwich and I pulled myself together. When we got to the theater I ordered some ginger ale and that helped too. After dinner I called the ship doctor and they said that the ship store had Bonine which would help and it definitely did. I must say, though, that me getting a little sick was the ONLY negative thing that happened the entire trip. It was so perfect!

To be continued....

Clara Turns 5!

Has it really been 5 years? I can remember every detail of the day that Clara LeAnn was born and it seems like yesterday. When I went for my 20 week ultrasound and they said it was a girl I was elated. I thought it was too good to be true and was scared to wash any of her clothes! Then on April 18, 2005 at 10:10 PM after only 5 pushes out she came, all 8 lbs 11 oz of her. Funny that she was my biggest baby but she is soooo tiny now! Through these 5 years I have been terrified at times at the thought of raising daughters and at other times am filled with excited emotion. I want to give my girls the mother-daughter relationship that I yearned for growing up. The relationship that I didn't really know that I missed out on until I was an adult. I'm always worried that I'll get it wrong but maybe with that worry I'll be on my toes and get it right. My children are being raised in the complete opposite environment that I did so I think they'll be alright. I strive everyday to be a better mother to my 3 sweet kids and hopefully they'll all appreciate that when they grow up.

Clara has grown into such a funny, independent, smart, dramatic, creative little girl. She has been my "easy" kid so I was sad to let her go to preschool this year. It will be even worse when she is in all day Kindergarten next year! She is also a sleeper like her mommy and is hard to get up if it's earlier than she's ready to. She's also pretty grumpy when she doesn't get her sleep, just like her mommy :) I see many traits in her that remind her of me, but not all. She is defintely like me in that she lets people push her buttons and "get to her." I have lots of compassion when she is getting picked on by Ethan or Meredith! Her artistic ability astounds Ben and I and also her teachers at school. They just gush over her and told me that in all their years teaching they've never had a student with her art and creative skills.

Clara had a great birthday this year. After changing her mind several times she finally settled on a Hello Kitty party theme. She invited about 12 friends to the party and I think 8 or 9 came and they all had fun. They made a door hanger craft with Hello Kitty stickers and played Pin the Bow on Hello Kitty. I made her cake which was a labor of love but at least I didn't try to do anything from scratch this year. It's so much easier to buy a cake! I don't know why I do that to myself! She got spoiled with presents from us, her friends, her Grandma Hancey, and her Nana and it was such a joy to see her so excited over everything. When I was decorating for her party she just hugged me and said "I love you mom. Thank you for my party." She is such a sweetheart (most of the time). Oh, and when I asked her what she wanted for her birthday breakfast and dinner she said, "I want cinnamon rolls, the homeade kind, for breakfast. You know, the ones you made at Christmas. Then for dinner I want pasta with shrimp and red sauce." That girl knows what she wants! I tried to talk her into canned cinnamon rolls but she wasn't having it. Darn! She's worth all the effort that we put into making her birthday weekend special.

Easter

We had a great Easter holiday this year! We had fun dyeing eggs as a family and went to our friend's house who live just around the corner for a potluck. Our friend's, the Clyde's, had us over with the Ivey's and it was fun. We had a wonderful dinner and then had an egg hunt at the park across the street. It was fun watching the kids having so much fun! Here are some pics from our holiday.

Spring Break in Arizona

A couple of months ago Ben and I started talking about what to do for Spring Break this year. We looked on a map to see where we could drive to in 8 hours or less and thought that it would be fun to go to the Phoenix area. Ben has lots of family there and I had never been AND it was warm so it wasn't a hard decision. We ended up getting invited to stay with Ben's cousin Kalene and we were so grateful. We had such a wonderful time! It was mine and the kid's first time seeing the saguaro cactus and we were just in awe. I had no idea there were SO MANY all over the place. Kalene and her family were amazing hosts and we felt so much at home there. It was fun to get to know more of that side of the family. We were there for 4 nights and got to explore lots of fun places. We went to the McCormick Railroad Park, Goldfield Ghost Town, Phoenix Zoo, In-n-Out Burger (my first), Fashion Square mall, Houston's, and the Arizona Aloha Festival. We got to spend a whole afternoon and evening at a park by Aunt Shirley's just hanging out with lots of cousins. The kids had a blast! Ben and I even got to go out on a dinner date to Houston's which is Ben's favorite restaurant ever. Dani watched the kids for us which was so nice. The kids all fell in love with Kalene and I think the feeling was mutual. She even let them have ice cream for breakfast and bought them Lucky Charms! I have so many pictures from our trip so I'll just pick some of my favorites.

Happy Birthday to ME!

I'm a litte behind on my blogging! On March 10 I turned the big 3-0 and I had such a great birthday. I thought that I would be depressed about turning 30 but it really didn't bother me. The first time it hit me was when I had to input my age on my elliptical machine after my birthday. This is going to be a great year! I am determined to get in the best shape that I've been in since before having kids and I know I can do it. Since last August I've lost 20 lbs and have about 20 more to go to reach my ultimate goal. I'm only 6 lbs away from my goal for my cruise! I've got until May 1 to lose these last 6 and know I will.
Anyway, the Friday before my birthday we celebrated with our closest friends here-Hooper's, Dennehl's, Coryell's, Clyde's. The Pengelly's couldn't make it :( The plan was to meet at Flying Star for dinner then go bowling at the Santa Ana Star Casino. We had lots of laughs at dinner and I openened my awesome presents. I got Bath & Body Works candles, lotion, and body wash from Amanda, Katie, and Becky. Then I got an initialed wooden cheese board and a gift certificate for a mani and pedi from Julie, Rachelle, and Heather. After dinner we went to the casino and the bowling alley was only open to leagues. Bummer! We were surprised since it was a Friday and annoyed that we walked through the smoky casino for nothing. So we all met back at our house for games. We ended up playing Just Dance on the Wii and it was soooo much fun! It was better than bowling in my opinion. Watching those grown men dance to the Spice Girls was priceless!
For my actual birthday on the following Wednesday I just relaxed and took care of the kids as usual. I did NO housework and watched tv in the middle of the day so it was great! I also baked a delicious chocolate cake for myself since Ben was at work and I wanted to anyway. When Ben got home I opened my presents from the kids. Ben had taken the kids to the dollar store and let them pick out anything they wanted to get for me. He didn't help them at all, just let them get whatever and it was so cute what they chose. Clara got me a flower windmill to put in the yard, Meredith got me a hanging bird's nest, and Ethan got me a candle and a rock type thing with birds engraved and the saying "peace" on it. Ethan had $2 of his own to spend and decided to spend it on me so he could get me two things. How sweet is that? Then Ben made me a yummy dinner-grilled chicken, grilled asparagus, grilled foil packet potatoes, and french bread. Afterwards we all had chocolate cake and Blue Bell ice cream. The perfect end to a great birthday! Here are some of my favorite pictures of my birthday events.

3 Years Ago Today....

Today is the anniversary of my dad, Charles Gary Allen's death. It was 3 years ago and it hasn't gotten easier. Maybe it never will. I was about 5 months pregnant with Meredith and we were living in Ohio when it happened. I'll never forget the call from my brother Brandon. Ethan was only 4 and he still remembers my screams and me crying so much. He died in a motorcycle accident with a massive head injury. My poor stepmom didn't even find out he had died and was in a hospital in Houston until after the fact. That still haunts her to know that he died alone. Ben wasn't able to leave school because he was in the middle of a crazy semester and just couldn't leave. He was getting his master's at the Air Force Institute of Technology. I knew I couldn't handle it with 2 kids and we really couldn't afford 2 plane tickets anyway so I flew out with just Clara. I had many wonderful friends who helped out with Ethan while I was gone which was only 4 days I think. The whole trip was kind of a blur and I remember just feeling numb. But when I got to town I went straight to my dad's house to be with my stepmom and brothers. I'd never had a panic attack before and I was pretty close to having a full blown one when I drove up and saw the house. Everytime I went there my dad would always come out and wait for me on the porch, he was always standing there and it was just unreal to not see him there. Thankfully my stepbrother Clint came out to the car and calmed me down and helped with Clara. I honestly don't know how I got through those 4 days. I remember everyone being worried about me because I was pregnant and they had good reason too. When I finally got the courage to go in and see my dad at the viewing my stepmom had to be there to literally catch me. I still can't believe he's gone. I had just seen him 4 months before that when I flew with the kids to TX for Thanksgiving. I am so so glad that I made that trip because I almost didn't. I remember him being so excited that I was having another baby. I regret not taking more pictures that trip because I only have a few. The last time I saw him, he and Marilyn took me and the kids out to eat at Catfish King. I was newly pregnant and very nauseated and that was what I was craving. He gave Clara her first ice cream cone at the restaurant and we were all cracking up watching her eat it. Ethan was really timid with him that trip but Clara was just smitten with him and he ate up every second of it. I have the cutest video of him dancing with her around his living room during that trip. I haven't been able to watch it for a long time though. Maybe I'll show it to Clara today, I think she would love it. His voice is still on my answering machine. He had called a few days before and I didn't even realize it until after the fact. I have so much guilt for that because he was saying that he missed me and wanted me to call him. We hadn't talked in probably a month. When I had to have an emergency c-section with Meredith 6 weeks early I was scared to death. I remember lying on that operating table and feeling so strongly that my dad was there. It was so real and his presence was so strong. Meredith has my dad's exact color of dark blue eyes. He wasn't there to meet her in person but he gave her his eyes for me. My dad didn't come into my life until I was 13 so I only really had 14 years with him. That wasn't enough.
Here are some of my favorite pictures of my dad.

June 2003 Ethan and I with dad and Granny Lowe. This was the first time they had met Ethan.

April 2004 We were living in San Antonio at the time so we got to visit lots. My dad adored Ethan.

April 2004 Seeing my dad on his bike is so bittersweet. He had ridden all his life and it brought him so much joy.

April 2004 Ethan and I with dad and Marilyn in the beautiful Texas bluebonnets.

June 2005 Dad meeting Clara for the first time.

November 2006 Last visit with my dad.

November 2006 Ethan and Clara on dad's bike.